Would you go on holiday without your kids?
Thatβs the question I asked when Misery Guts and I prepared to leave our older two for six days and nights and fly 1,000 miles across Europe to a wedding. And it produced quite a response.
There were the βhell yesesβ and the βabsolutely notsβ, and while it took a lot for me to leave them and I canβt tell you how many bouts of mum guilt I had while we were there, a bit like why I was right not to write a birth plan I do think we were right to go on holiday without the kids.
Hereβs why.
Why I was right to go on holiday without the kids
1. We got to see a part of the world we just wouldnβt with kids. Letβs face it, some types of holiday just arenβt child-friendly. We spent a day in Rome where we clocked up almost 20,000 steps exploring the city and viewing ancient monuments. Had the kids been with us theyβd never have walked that far, theyβd have moaned about queuing to get into attractions and weβd have had to have had eyes in the back of our head every single second. Which isnβt fun for anyone.
2. It gave us a break from them and them a break from us. If thereβs one word Iβd use to describe parenthood itβs relentless, but going away with just one of our three gave us a break from the normal routine and them a break from me, and more specifically me losing my sh*t, which owing to not having slept through the night for seven months tends to happen quite a lot lately.
3. We all had time to miss each other. And missing people gives you time to think about them, and thinking about them makes you appreciate them more. I didnβt miss almost-three-year-old nappies though.
4. We came back better parents. Because we had a change of scene, a chance to relax and unwind, I came back a better mum with recharged batteries and lots of patience instead of running on empty with a dangerously short fuse, which is the usual state of play.
5. They got a chance to bond with their grandparents. My mum and dad looked after them for the majority of the trip and because they live too far away they donβt usually get to play a part in their everyday, day-to-day lives. This gave them all a chance to spend time together in a way they just wouldnβt normally.
Of course we missed them like hell and I wouldnβt go out of my way to book a holiday without the kids in the future, but if circumstances such as an invitation to a wedding to which kids werenβt invited arose again I think there are benefits to be had all round.
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What do you think? Do you think I was right to go on holiday without the kids? What would you have done in my shoes? Iβd love to hear your thoughts!
Hello! I think you are completely right! Time away is important for you to relax and unwind. And I agree, having the chance to miss someone makes you appreciate them even more. My kids go away with their grandfather for about 2 weeks every summer. While I miss them like crazy, it gives my husband and I some much needed us time and a chance to just relax. (and have a clean house for at least a few days before the kiddos tear it up again) But after about the first 4 days I start missing them like crazy. I think all parents should spend at least a few days away from their kids every once in a while, its good for everybody.
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Thanks for sharing this post!! I was going to take my baby girl on holiday with me but with money now being a little tigher, I decided to go alone and have been feeling mum guilt since. Your post has reassured me a little and I’m hoping that I will still be able to enjoy myself too! π #thelistlinky
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