It occurred to me, when a parcel arrived containing something for me and not for BB and she crossed her arms and stamped her foot, that there are traits peculiar to a blogger’s child which make them stand out from other children.

I often hear myself telling BB she doesn’t know how lucky she is thanks to all the opportunities that come as a result of blogging, but of course she doesn’t understand because she can’t remember a time when things were any different.

Here are 10 signs a baby is a blogger’s child:

1. They assume every parcel that arrives at the door is for them. And have a melt-down if it isn’t.

2. Their bedrooms are stuffed with an unusually high number of personalised items. From wall stickers and pictures to aprons and towels, they possess more products with their names on than the average child.

3. They start out thinking a normal trip to the cinema involves face painting, balloons and entertainers in the foyer and goody bags for the film. And are mightily miffed when they eventually realise this isn’t always the case.

4. They understand all about product placement and can always be relied on to hold a product up to the camera and smile with it.

5. They’ve been on more days out than they can remember. From Legoland to the Sea Life Centre to theme parks and petting zoos, days out are a regular weekend activity as opposed to a novelty.

6. They’ve got a skewed view of customer service. Because of all the reviews, special events and trips you’re asked to review they think customer service at all restaurants, hotels and theme parks is 100%.

7. They’re not brand loyal. Their toiletries, nappies, clothes and toys come from a mish mash of different companies because you’ve been sent them for free.

8. A cursory glance over their toy collection will reveal the very latest gadgets and gismos. Often before they’re actually on the market.

9. They grasp the concept of vouchers as a form of payment from an early age. Because you get paid for posts with vouchers and get sent vouchers to try out new products, they totally get how vouchers work.

10. They’ll ask how many ‘likes’ their latest Instagram or Facebook picture has. (I don’t encourage this one).

Reading back over this list calls to mind Veruca Salt, the spoilt one from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I do my best to ensure BB and Little B aren’t spoilt, but I’m afraid the crossing of arms and stamping of the foot when a parcel isn’t addressed to them is an occupational hazard when you’re a blogger’s child.

Do you have or do you know a blogger’s child? Are there any other signs I’ve missed? I’d love to hear them!

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