If you’re a regular follower of the blog you’ll know with three kids we’re outnumbered.
Which means when one grown up is otherwise engaged whoever is left holding the baby is well and truly outnumbered.
The latest grown up to find themselves outnumbered is me after Misery Guts flew to Italy for work. It was only for two days, but it felt like two weeks.
It’s not the first time I’ve been left flying solo, but for some reason it was the hardest its ever been and made me realise there are certain things they just don’t tell you about being outnumbered.
Things they don’t tell you about being outnumbered
1. Things happen that don’t happen when you’ve got reinforcement. Like poonamis that require total strip down of them and you the second you wake up in the morning, and the baby eating toast they’ve extracted from the bin next to a dirty nappy you hadn’t put in a sack because you were too busy being outnumbered.
2. There’s no-one to appreciate the truly low points of the day. Like what you thought was a stone in the bottom of the washing machine but was in fact a smooth patty of reformed poo, even though you’d rinsed out the offending garment first. I kid you not people, such a mash-up is indeed possible. Possibly my most disgusting parenting moment yet.
3. You get shouty. Because there’s only so many times you can say ‘put your shoes on’ and ‘brush your teeth’ without flipping out.
4. You resolve to use the lack of reinforcement as an opportunity to get an early night and go to bed when the kids go to bed. Except you’re opening the fridge the minute their heads hit the pillow pouring yourself a nice glass of wine. And then another.
Kicking off the week outnumbered & flying solo with Misery Guts abroad for work – l already know I’ll be having a glass of wine tonight! #sendhelp #outnumbered #mondaymorning #mumlife #mumprobs #threeisthemagicnumber #motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #capturingtheday #oureverydaymoments #documentyourdays
5. Your parenting style comes under critique – by your six-year-old. ‘Daddy doesn’t drive to school this way – he goes that way’ or ‘Daddy doesn’t read it like that’.
6. You have zero sympathy for the other half who comes home tired and drained after a ‘back to back’ schedule of networking which just happened to involve a cocktail reception and five course meal at one of Milan’s top restaurants.
7. You get a good present. Because they wouldn’t dare come home empty handed.
8. You can milk the fact you were flying solo for at least double the amount of time they were actually gone for. If not more.
Have you been left flying solo recently? Do you have any top tips for the next time I’m well and truly outnumbered? I’d love to hear what they are!