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About crummymummy1

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So far crummymummy1 has created 576 blog entries.

I’ve got the whole world in my hands

So you may (or may not) be surprised to hear we made it back from Scotland unscathed. I say unscathed – we were both nursing the kind of hangovers we haven’t had since BBB (before BB) – but apart from that we managed to make it home in one piece. And you may (or may not) be surprised to hear that two whole days and nights away from BB weren’t that bad after all. Walks one would never entertain with a pushchair, tops one would never wear while breast feeding, afternoon naps, leisurely baths before going out to dinner, sipping numerous wines and spirits into the wee hours without being under the glare of the baby monitor: I could get quite used to it. […]

By |May 6th, 2013|Breast feeding, Family life, Travel|0 Comments

Silent Sunday: May 5, 2013

By |May 5th, 2013|Uncategorized|6 Comments

Don’t think: the best piece of advice I’ve ever been given

My Granny once told me that if she ever wakes up in the middle of the night to go to the loo, she repeats the words ‘don’t think, don’t think, don’t think, don’t think’ over and over again in her head until she’s been to the toilet and back because, she told me sagely, ‘if you start thinking, you’ll never get back to sleep.’ This is probably one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever been given. Ever since she imbibed this little pearl of wisdom years ago I’ve used it, and it works a treat. I have no doubt following this ritual has saved me from much tossing and turning and many sleepless nights. That is, it worked a treat until this week. In a few hours I will get on a plane and stay away for two nights without BB. The horrors that could unfold have been plaguing me all week (what if the plane crashes, what if BB thinks we’ve abandoned her and is scarred for life, etc, etc) and the possibilities have been even worse in the small hours. […]

By |May 3rd, 2013|Family life, Travel|0 Comments

My baby now comes complete with an instruction manual

Who said kids don’t come with an instruction manual? Mine does. I’ve just written it. It’s called ‘Things you always wanted to know about BB but were afraid to ask’. The need for such a manual comes ahead of our first weekend away sans BB: two whole nights in Inverness, Scotland. I realise this doesn’t sound like the ideal location for a weekend getaway à deux, but the trip happens to coincide with Speyside Whisky Festival. And Misery Guts loves whisky. Need I say more? So we are leaving BB in the capable hands of Granny and Grandpa, backed up by said instruction manual, just in case. Advice includes ‘cleaning her teeth can be a challenge – it might be a case of pinning her down to get to the back’ and ‘it can take her a good 30 minutes to come round after her afternoon nap, when she can sometimes be a real grump’. Helpful? Probably not. Does putting them down on paper make me feel better? Yes. […]

By |May 1st, 2013|Breast feeding, Family life|2 Comments

Priority seats for mums with toddlers: now there’s an idea

We all know being a mum with a buggy on public transport can be tricky: there’s usually a (large) step up to board the vehicle, sliding doors to manoeuvre and narrow aisles to navigate, but when you’ve successfully accomplished those, you’re generally pretty well catered for. Unless you’re unfortunate enough to travel on South West Trains. It seemed the perfect mode of transport for BB and I ahead of a weekend in Dorset. The excitement of the station, a picnic lunch as houses whizzed by, a table on which to do colouring and plenty of space to clamber around. I don’t know what I was thinking. Clapham Junction + toddler in a pushchair + weekend bag on a Friday afternoon = bad idea. […]

By |April 29th, 2013|Family life|0 Comments

Silent Sunday: April 28, 2013

By |April 28th, 2013|Uncategorized|0 Comments

While you were sleeping

It never fails to amaze me what it’s possible to achieve during afternoon nap time. This week, between the hours of 1pm and 3pm, I have: 1) Given four wooden chairs two coats of paint 2) Washed, folded and put away five loads of washing 3) Sorted out the household budget for the month 4) Written three blog posts 5) Had a nap myself 6) Saved the world (ok, I made that one up) And that’s not all. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve said to myself ‘You’re knackered. Today you’re going to sit down with a cup of tea while BB’s having her nap’. This never happens, because there are always so many things it’s so much easier, and quicker, to do when she’s not there. Which got me thinking. There must be an army of mums across the country, the world even, who after clearing away the lunch things and settling their pre-schoolers in their cots spin into action and accomplish all manner of weird and wonderful tasks in just two little hours. So I googled ‘things to do when babies are napping’. The very first page to come up suggests ‘what to do while you’re waiting for your baby to wake up’. Waiting? Are they insane? Who on earth ‘waits’ for their baby to wake up? It then goes on to suggest five fun activities to do during this ‘boring’ nap time. […]

By |April 26th, 2013|Family life|6 Comments

Tuesday: the best day of the working week

The nuclear winter is over. Yesterday we emerged, blinking and pale as though we’d been indoors for a thousand months, and were greeted with a cloudless blue sky and glorious sunshine. For the first time since we moved to the south coast five months ago our daily constitutional walk was less constitutional and more playful: we shed our coats which had begun to feel like a second skin, we felt the warmth of the sun on our arms, we threw stones into the sea and ate ice lollies. The sun went straight to our heads. And we weren’t the only ones. Beach hut doors were thrown open, barbecues were lit, old ladies, also blinking and pale, were wheeled onto the promenade to sniff at the sea air and students played guitars on the beach. A queue snaked out from the ice cream kiosk while women who really shouldn’t wear hot pants and men who really oughtn’t go shirtless did just that. Children, like BB (pictured), and dogs leapt around on the pebbles, giddy with the sense of excitement they’d caught from the adults. […]

By |April 24th, 2013|Exercise, Family life|1 Comment

A girl can never have too many…headbands

Now I’m not normally a fan of headbands on babies – I don’t really see the point, especially when they don’t have any hair – but check this out (pictured). This super duper little number from Cute Cute landed on our doormat on Friday and I’m in love. Forget plastic or fabric covered metal, this one is made from the softest lace, boasts a glittery pink rose and is about as Downton Abbey as you can get. Needless to say my little rose adores it, and it’s been round her head ever since. It even fits round my head, and as Misery Guts unhelpfully pointed out, it would also make a great garter (for me, not BB, of course). […]

By |April 22nd, 2013|Beauty, Family life, Fashion, Reviews|0 Comments

Silent Sunday: April 21, 2013

By |April 21st, 2013|Uncategorized|0 Comments

More conversations I’ve overheard this week (and wish I hadn’t)

Is there no limit to what people will openly discuss in public places? It would appear coffee shops, where regular followers will know I can often be found bashing out a story or two when I’ve swapped my mummy hat for my journalist one, are now the place to conduct business. Apart from failing to give anyone involved any privacy, I don’t think I’ve ever come across anything more unprofessional than discussing the inner workings of a company or individual next to yummy mummies sipping their skinny lattes or journalists on the hunt for story ideas (aka moi). These are (just some) of the exchanges I’ve been unable to avoid overhearing this week: 1) A testosterone battle between one suited man and his colleague, one of whom had flown to their coffee shop meeting (in Sussex) from Liverpool. After outlining the agenda of their meeting – how best to bid for funding for the charitable trust they worked for – they then spent more than an hour criticising each other’s decision making skills. Not very charitable. And surely this could have been done over the phone? I still can’t help but wonder how much the flight cost the poor charity. 2) An interview for a new coffee shop manager. It transpired the existing senior barista wanted the job, but the man from head office conducting the interview told the applicant he didn’t think this chap was ‘quite suitable’. I’m not sure if they’ve told the poor guy yet – when I ordered my cup of tea this morning he’s still being super helpful and friendlier than usual, although I’m not complaining. But something’s not right when the customers are one step ahead of the staff. […]

By |April 18th, 2013|Family life, Food, Work life|0 Comments

The hoarder next door: yep that’s me

Two weeks after committing (online) Tesco suicide, things are going swimmingly with Asda. Not only does the weekly shop now arrive on time and in date, it is cheaper and so far has come with one of my favourite things in the whole wide world: free samples. These appeal to me on a number of levels: 1) They’re free 2) They come in the cutest, minniest sizes you’ve ever seen. Think Honey I Shrunk The Pantene 3) They are trussed up in equally miniature bags, often featuring a bow This is the little stash (pictured) which arrived this week: eight tubes of Colgate toothpaste and five sachets of stir fry sauce. Of course they can’t possibly be used. Because they might come in handy one day. Like the miniature pots of Sudocrem, the tiny tubes of Johnson’s and a hessian pouch of cotton wool balls that came in the hospital bounty pack when I had BB. All of which are in the drawer under her cot, still in the little bags they came in. […]

By |April 16th, 2013|Family life, Food|2 Comments

Silent Sunday: April 14, 2013

By |April 14th, 2013|Uncategorized|1 Comment

Comfy shoes: the thin end of the wedge gets thicker

If my plastic glasses were the thin end of the wedge, then the wedge has just got thicker. Decidedly thicker. Check out my latest shoe acquisition. Designer? No. Gorgeous? Sadly not. High heeled? Don’t be silly. It is with the greatest regret I must admit, for the first time ever with the exception of trainers, I have bought a pair of shoes based on their comfort, durability and affordability. From Clarks. They look like the sort of thing my 87-year-old Granny would wear. Worse, they are the sort of thing my 87-year-old Granny does wear. Even my 91-year-old Granny, who owns a pair of Ugg boots, is more on trend than I am. Worse still, my new pair of shoes boast WaveWalk technology. Attractive. […]

By |April 12th, 2013|Beauty, Family life, Fashion|2 Comments

Passport photo shocker

I’ve done it. I’ve scarred BB for life. Despite best efforts, this is her first passport photo. It’s going to haunt her for the rest of her life. And she’s going to hate me for it. Kissable lips and delightfully chubby cheeks aside, how is it possible that she looks as though she’s been shouldered into the frame with her hands behind her back by a burly police officer having done something she knows she really shouldn’t? And how is it possible that what was a fairly expensive salon bob looks like I’ve put a pudding bowl on her head and cut round it. Badly. […]

By |April 10th, 2013|Beauty, Family life|2 Comments